Spirit of 77 Season 1 Episode 5
Spirit of 77 S1 E5: You Maniacs! You Blew It Up! Damn You all to a Mayoral Pardon!
Starring
- Mike as Tom S Fisherman: a gonzo journalist known as one bad mother on the streets, but this is a woman's prison; where apparently he continues to give zero fucks about killing his way to what he wants. Is pretty sure Baphomet isn't gonna get out of this one alive though.
- Stephen as Killian "Baphomet" Burque: goth glam rocker alien visitor with a short temper that gets him into trouble. Has developed a talking vagina on his arm that wasn't there when he got into the prison, but he is rolling with it. He's been beaten and tazed and drugged repeatedly. Is starting to think he's dragging Tom down.
That night in their cell Tom and Baphomet tried to piece together everything they had seen. After Audrey's strange behavior, the prison went on lock down right after the meal. She was taken to the medical wing by Dr Beach.
"They fuckin switched her fucking fuck fuck brain FUCK!" Baphomet was on a roller coaster of Earth drugs coursing through his system, " I swear I saw a monkey in that lab they took me to. When it started to wake up that doctor guy ran over and put it back under really quick. Like he was afraid it would wake up even though it was tied down. I bet that's where he's storing the real Audrey's brain."
"Shit. Are you serious? This changes my plans," Tom paced frustrated, "Do you think the doctor could perform the brain surgery again to switch it back? No, on second thought we better not give him the chance to double cross us. We'll need to bring in our own surgeon."
"How?" Baphomet said as his pupils dilated randomly.
"We'll smuggle the bastard in. I'll figure out a way to do it during the night shift in the kitchen," Tom sound so confident that Baphomet gave up trying to analyse his plan.
The next morning right after breakfast, the pair had a visitor. They were escorted to a room with a row of inmates talking into telephones looking through plate glass windows. At the booth at the end of the row sat Chelsea Hazelnutt, the mayor's assistant that hired them.
"Right to the point, not even and hello how are you? You wound me Chelsea. You wound me." Baphomet began to weep silently as Tom and Chelsea looked on confused.
"Uh....okay then. We found the girl. She's had her brain switched with an ape. Which do you want? Ape Audrey or Audrey Ape?" Tom asked as he leaned in toward the plate glass.
Chelsea didn't so much as blink before responding, "You are to bring the Audrey Audrey out or you don't ever see this again." She held the Mayoral Pardon up to the glass.
"Listen, I'm all for bringing the real deal out to you. I just don't have a brain surgeon in here to do the switching for me. Do you think you could get me a brain surgeon smuggled in here?" Tom asked.
"I work for the mayor's office. Just how powerful do you think we are here? We will not be allowing Ms Scates' unfortunate situation to be spread to the general public. You will do the job you've been contracted for gentleman. Now I can help you out some what with your plan, but a brain surgeon is not a possibility. A brain surgeon to switch brains between an ape and a young girl? How do you even advertise for one of those."
As she said this Baphomet drifted into a trance, His vision showed a shadow puppet play of a mean doctor strapped a girl and an ape to tables, connecting their brains to a machine and then pulling a switch.
As soon as he came out of it, he spoke "We need to start a fucking riot. We don't need a surgeon, we need a distraction man. Like the doctor guy, he like used a machine, man, and got like their brains zapped and switched their electrical impulses and shit man. We don't need a surgeon, any monkey can pull a switch."
"Can you get us stuff for a riot?" Tom asked into the phone.
"I'll see what I can do. There will be an experimental X-tech device with enough juice for one use that will unlock all the doors in the prison. The Eastwood Morris Bakery will make a delivery tonight. Don't eat the bread," as she said this, she hung up her phone and left.
After the visitation they made the rounds informing prisoners that there was going to be a riot and they should all join in. Rhonda didn't take kindly to Tom lying to her about everyone else in the prison knowing before here. He tried unsuccessfully to convince her that she was the last hold out and everyone else was on board. She stormed away angry that he'd think something this big could happen without her knowledge.
He told Big Millie that Rhonda was planning an attack during the riot and he was looking out for Big Millie. She was grateful for the heads up. Tom asked if she'd mind keeping an eye out for a "bread" delivery he was expecting. Normally Big Millie wants her cut of anything moving in or out of the prison, but since he warned her ahead of time.
Finally they met with Mitzi Fuentes, the girl from the cult that still hadn't been rescued by her prophet. She'd gotten quiet the past few days, but when Tom told her about the riot she squealed with glee.
"I will rain hell fire on the non-believers!" Mitzi shouted as she threw her blanket off her bed to reveal a large collection of Molotov cocktails, "I will pay those bastard guards back for trapping me here and separating me from the prophet's light."
Satisfied he'd told enough people to raise a ruckus during the cover-riot, Tom went to the kitchen to pick up his delivery. Big Millie had a garbage bag of strange breads that had been delivered with his name on them.
Helga Sasquatchorski was waiting for Tom back at the cell. Baphomet was still pretty beat up from before, so he offered to be Tom's back up if he did all the hitting of things.
"Alright you get Audrey Ape and I'll make sure our way out is clear," Tom said.
Baphomet double dosed his drug cocktail for the escape and started to hum and whistle and beat box a tune to get Tom pumped.
Tom lit off some fire works that had been included in his riot-kit and mashed down on the X-tech remote. The doors buzzed open and Tom tossed a smoke bomb out into the open area.
There was a the sound of the simian guards going into a frenzy from the sudden explosive noise that kicked in their base instincts. Followed by the silence of the failsafe kicking in and all of the simian guards becoming docile and sedate, unmoving.
As the alarm sounded to alert the back-up human guards, the prisoners erupted into howls and shouts. Everything kicked off at once.
Mitzi threw molotov cocktails toward the guards that were rushing in. Rhonda's crew rushed Big Millie's crew. The human guards fired off tear gas, but seemed unprepared for
engagement with prisoners in any way.
When they left their cell, Tom was immediately confronted by one of Rhonda's crew who clocked him in the face right away. Tom stumbled but turned and judo threw her into the a cell and slammed the door. Baphomet zapped the lock with his electrical field to keep the lock closed. Another prisoner came charging down the walkway toward them, Tom swung and missed terribly. Luckily the prisoner wasn't even paying attention and just kept on going.
They saw her run into one of the human guards who tazed and cuffed her before getting out his baton to advance on them. Tom found a tear gas grenade in his kit and tossed it toward the guard before they turned and headed in the other direction.
Baphomet moved as quickly as he could taking a glancing blow with a sock full of batteries as he rushed to find Audrey Ape docile in her cell. He called out to Tom to start heading toward the exit.
Tom was barreling through everyone to clear their way. Tom asked Helga Sasquatorski to take care of the human guards at the exit blocking their path. After she recognized the guards as ones that had tormented her in solitary confinement, she got angry.
She grunted an agreement to Tom's request, before rushing the guards, ripping a porcelain water fountain off the wall and smashing their heads in before they were even able to react. She didn't stop pummeling them until the rest of the crew caught up to her and opened the door to the outside.
The guards were all distracted by the riot, so they had no trouble gaining entry to Dr Beach's lab. He was busy on a large X-tech computer, observing the riots through video feed and frantically trying to issue overide commands for the fail-safes to get the simian guards to bring order to the prison again.
Tom tried to sucker punch him in the back of the head but missed and punched the wall beside him. He tried to play it off like he hadn't just missed an attempted attack, but Dr Beach saw right through it. Instead of trying to convince him further, Helga just tied him to a chair as he muttered and rambled about needing to restore order.
Luckily Ape Audrey was still strapped down to the table. Baphomet tried to wake her up gently, but his drug cocktail was all off and she woke up in a panicked state. She broke her arms free and knocked Baphomet away from her.
"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?! WHAT'S GOING ON?! AM I AN APE?! WHY AM I AN APE?!" She jumped off the table and began tearing apart the lab.
"Ma'am calm down, get on the table we need to switch your brain back into your body," Tom tried to be gentle, but commanding. It came off as being a dickhead. Ape Audry hurled a medical cart at him, knocking him to the floor.
Baphomet spoke slowly to calm her, "We don't want to be here any more longer than we have to. The sooner you get on the table the sooner we can get you back into your body and get the hell out of here."
Ape Audrey reluctantly climbed onto the table again. They attached all the wires and threatened Doctor Beat into pointing out how to activate the machine.
Without wasting a moment Tom shook Audrey Audrey awake, "Audrey is that you?" he said frantically.
"Oh my head," she replied.
"That's good enough for me. Helga?" the sasquatch tossed Audrey over her shoulder, "Quick to the employee parking, we'll swipe somebody's ride and blast through the gates."
The team rushed out to the parking lot, hot wired the closest car they could find headed toward the gates. He saw the guards waiving for them to stop the van.
"Baphomet, let's go get out dicks back," he tossed the tear gas grenades to Baphomet who immediately leaned out the door and hurled one at that gates.
Tom floored it as best as it could go weighed down with a sasquatch. The tear gas cleared the guards and the gates gave way even if the car wasn't the greased lightning that Tom had envisioned when stealing it.
Audrey safely returned to her family and the Mayoral Pardon in hand. The team heads back to The City to return to the life they left behind on weeks ago when they had gotten way too drunk and originally stolen the Aloha Express.
Oh and Baphomet's elbow-vagina turned back into an elbow-asshole once they got out of the women's prison.
After the visitation they made the rounds informing prisoners that there was going to be a riot and they should all join in. Rhonda didn't take kindly to Tom lying to her about everyone else in the prison knowing before here. He tried unsuccessfully to convince her that she was the last hold out and everyone else was on board. She stormed away angry that he'd think something this big could happen without her knowledge.
He told Big Millie that Rhonda was planning an attack during the riot and he was looking out for Big Millie. She was grateful for the heads up. Tom asked if she'd mind keeping an eye out for a "bread" delivery he was expecting. Normally Big Millie wants her cut of anything moving in or out of the prison, but since he warned her ahead of time.
Finally they met with Mitzi Fuentes, the girl from the cult that still hadn't been rescued by her prophet. She'd gotten quiet the past few days, but when Tom told her about the riot she squealed with glee.
"I will rain hell fire on the non-believers!" Mitzi shouted as she threw her blanket off her bed to reveal a large collection of Molotov cocktails, "I will pay those bastard guards back for trapping me here and separating me from the prophet's light."
Satisfied he'd told enough people to raise a ruckus during the cover-riot, Tom went to the kitchen to pick up his delivery. Big Millie had a garbage bag of strange breads that had been delivered with his name on them.
Helga Sasquatchorski was waiting for Tom back at the cell. Baphomet was still pretty beat up from before, so he offered to be Tom's back up if he did all the hitting of things.
"Alright you get Audrey Ape and I'll make sure our way out is clear," Tom said.
Baphomet double dosed his drug cocktail for the escape and started to hum and whistle and beat box a tune to get Tom pumped.
Tom lit off some fire works that had been included in his riot-kit and mashed down on the X-tech remote. The doors buzzed open and Tom tossed a smoke bomb out into the open area.
There was a the sound of the simian guards going into a frenzy from the sudden explosive noise that kicked in their base instincts. Followed by the silence of the failsafe kicking in and all of the simian guards becoming docile and sedate, unmoving.
As the alarm sounded to alert the back-up human guards, the prisoners erupted into howls and shouts. Everything kicked off at once.
Mitzi threw molotov cocktails toward the guards that were rushing in. Rhonda's crew rushed Big Millie's crew. The human guards fired off tear gas, but seemed unprepared for
engagement with prisoners in any way.
When they left their cell, Tom was immediately confronted by one of Rhonda's crew who clocked him in the face right away. Tom stumbled but turned and judo threw her into the a cell and slammed the door. Baphomet zapped the lock with his electrical field to keep the lock closed. Another prisoner came charging down the walkway toward them, Tom swung and missed terribly. Luckily the prisoner wasn't even paying attention and just kept on going.
They saw her run into one of the human guards who tazed and cuffed her before getting out his baton to advance on them. Tom found a tear gas grenade in his kit and tossed it toward the guard before they turned and headed in the other direction.
Baphomet moved as quickly as he could taking a glancing blow with a sock full of batteries as he rushed to find Audrey Ape docile in her cell. He called out to Tom to start heading toward the exit.
Tom was barreling through everyone to clear their way. Tom asked Helga Sasquatorski to take care of the human guards at the exit blocking their path. After she recognized the guards as ones that had tormented her in solitary confinement, she got angry.
She grunted an agreement to Tom's request, before rushing the guards, ripping a porcelain water fountain off the wall and smashing their heads in before they were even able to react. She didn't stop pummeling them until the rest of the crew caught up to her and opened the door to the outside.
The guards were all distracted by the riot, so they had no trouble gaining entry to Dr Beach's lab. He was busy on a large X-tech computer, observing the riots through video feed and frantically trying to issue overide commands for the fail-safes to get the simian guards to bring order to the prison again.
Tom tried to sucker punch him in the back of the head but missed and punched the wall beside him. He tried to play it off like he hadn't just missed an attempted attack, but Dr Beach saw right through it. Instead of trying to convince him further, Helga just tied him to a chair as he muttered and rambled about needing to restore order.
Luckily Ape Audrey was still strapped down to the table. Baphomet tried to wake her up gently, but his drug cocktail was all off and she woke up in a panicked state. She broke her arms free and knocked Baphomet away from her.
"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?! WHAT'S GOING ON?! AM I AN APE?! WHY AM I AN APE?!" She jumped off the table and began tearing apart the lab.
"Ma'am calm down, get on the table we need to switch your brain back into your body," Tom tried to be gentle, but commanding. It came off as being a dickhead. Ape Audry hurled a medical cart at him, knocking him to the floor.
Baphomet spoke slowly to calm her, "We don't want to be here any more longer than we have to. The sooner you get on the table the sooner we can get you back into your body and get the hell out of here."
Ape Audrey reluctantly climbed onto the table again. They attached all the wires and threatened Doctor Beat into pointing out how to activate the machine.
Without wasting a moment Tom shook Audrey Audrey awake, "Audrey is that you?" he said frantically.
"Oh my head," she replied.
"That's good enough for me. Helga?" the sasquatch tossed Audrey over her shoulder, "Quick to the employee parking, we'll swipe somebody's ride and blast through the gates."
The team rushed out to the parking lot, hot wired the closest car they could find headed toward the gates. He saw the guards waiving for them to stop the van.
"Baphomet, let's go get out dicks back," he tossed the tear gas grenades to Baphomet who immediately leaned out the door and hurled one at that gates.
Tom floored it as best as it could go weighed down with a sasquatch. The tear gas cleared the guards and the gates gave way even if the car wasn't the greased lightning that Tom had envisioned when stealing it.
Comments
Post a Comment